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Daily Lenten Meditation
By Ronald White
1 Corinthians 9:16-27
If I proclaim the gospel, this gives me no ground for boasting, for an obligation is laid on me, and woe betide me if I do not proclaim the gospel! For if I do this of my own will, I have a reward; but if not of my own will, I am entrusted with a commission. What then is my reward? Just this: that in my proclamation I may make the gospel free of charge, so as not to make full use of my rights in the gospel.
For though I am free with respect to all, I have made myself a slave to all, so that I might win more of them. To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. To those under the law I became as one under the law (though I myself am not under the law) so that I might win those under the law. To those outside the law I became as one outside the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law) so that I might win those outside the law. To the weak I became weak, so that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all people, so that I might by any means save some. I do it all for the sake of the gospel, so that I may share in its blessings.
Do you not know that in a race the runners all compete, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win it. Athletes exercise self-control in all things; they do it to receive a perishable garland, but we an imperishable one. So I do not run aimlessly, nor do I box as though beating the air; but I punish my body and enslave it, so that after proclaiming to others I myself should not be disqualified. NRSV
If you are reading this meditation, you - like me - are on a spiritual journey. Else, you and I wouldn't have made the choice to invest ourselves in this spiritual exercise. Spiritual journeys are by their very nature intensely private experiences. The spiritual path we follow is uniquely our own: no one else can know our journey and no one else can travel it. Our spiritual journey is all about our interior life; it is a journey to places only we can go. Our external self is a reflection of the spiritual journey we are making. Our external religious practices are carefully crafted from the substance our internal spiritual path.
How, then, are we to understand these words that describe Paul's externalization of his interior spiritual life? Paul calls us to proclaim the gospel with no other reward than the act of proclaiming, no matter the cost. In order to do it effectively, he says that he had to become the servant of everyone he met. Ultimately, he claims, we will win the prize - "eternal life" - if we "run the race" well as he did.
The historical broader church has taught for now twenty centuries that the writer of these verses is Paul. These words reveal much about Paul's spiritual character and the quality of his interior life. He was a totally self-effacing man who denied himself for the service of proclaiming the gospel, the life example and teachings of Jesus Christ. Can we understand a human being who would deny themselves and become, as the writer says elsewhere, "all things to all people?" Can we imitate Paul who so completely emptied himself, including his acceptance of eventual imprisonment and death, that his interior spiritual self can be difficult to comprehend? Paul's example is powerful; but there have been others. We know that Mother Teresa lived her entire life in abject poverty for others who were also poor. So did Mahatma Ghandi. John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King and Malcolm X all died for what they believed during the lifetimes of many of us. How are we to respond to the lives of these and others who have gone before us? Were they more perfect than we are? If we don't follow them down their spiritual path, how do we overcome the guilt and shame which we may feel for not living up to their example? We go about our exterior lives, working for a paycheck, investing in a place to live, food and clothing, entertainment, and a car or other transportation. We appear to focus on our own needs first. I know I have said and have heard others express that only if our needs are met can we adequately serve others - our immediate family, our extended family, the lay ministries of the church, or myriad other causes.
The contrast between our interior spiritual journey and the life Paul calls us to is stark. No one else can know how weak or powerful our faith is, how much time and attention we devote to prayer - however we frame that experience - or to study or planning or service to others. No one else can know how much our spiritual life is "all about us" or is largely about "the others." Nor can we know about anyone else's. Our exterior life can give clues but cannot adequately reveal our truest spiritual self so that another person can know it with certainty. As revered as Mother Teresa is, she freely admitted that she suffered internal demons for most of her life.
The spiritual power implicit in the experience of Paul and the others that allowed them to freely give of themselves is something that we can obtain in our lives. We are called to a higher externalization of our private interior spiritual life. How, then, shall we live?
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