Tuesday, December 30, 2008

"Room Enough" - 7 Principles of Kwanzaa






"Room Enough" A reflection on the celebration of Kwanzaa.

*H&H Reccommends**


As delivered 12-28-08 http://www.mccgsl.org/




NGUZO SABA(The Seven Principles)

Umoja (Unity)Unity, the importance of togetherness "I am, because WE ARE".

Kujichagulia (Self-Determination) People must stand up for themselves "you name yourself"

Ujima (Collective Work and Responsibility) "We each have an individual Role, and a responsibility for the community"

Ujamaa (Cooperative Economics) To build and maintain our own stores, shops and other businesses and to profit from them together. "Meet Common Needs with Mutual Support"

Nia (Purpose)To make our collective vocation the building and developing of our community in order to restore our people to our full potential.

Kuumba (Creativity) Use creativity to build a Vibrant Community "Create and be our Own Art"

Imani (Faith) Honor the Best of All OUR tradtions, and believe in our heart that Diversity is our strength. Together we are a Beloved Community of Faith. ­

Monday, December 22, 2008

Resurrection Reflections - Rev. Jim Mitulski

www.HopeandHelpCenter.Org/ezekiel.aspx

The Rev. (Elder) Jim Mitulski as he spoke at MCC of San Francisco, April 22, 2007.

Rev. Mitulski Served as the pastor of MCCSF from 1986-2000. His reflections on Resurrection, and his recollection to the heritage of the congregation of MCCSF.

Rev. Mitulski recently served UFMCC as Region 2 Elder, in 2008 he began a new pastorate in Berkely, CA.

Topics include: Christian Resurrection, Healing Gospels, Liberation Gospels, HIV in the 1980's, MCC History, LGBT History, Church Prophecy, Theology & Liturgical Discussion, New Vision for MCC Fellowship, Historical Archives of Church History


Sunday, December 14, 2008

"I Hope This Works" - All Gods Children MCC


All God's Children Sermon Casts
Today, December 14, 2008, 7 hours ago

I Hope This Works
Today, December 14, 2008, 7 hours ago
December 14, 2008.


Monday, December 8, 2008

Hidden Treasures of St. Johns

www.HopeandHelpCenter.org
"God Buries His Workmen... but carries on his Work" ( stain glass window that was located in St. Johns UMC 63108) donated by the "Ladies Aid" group. *time unknown

I used to pass this window at St. Johns as I came in for worship each week. I never really payed much attention to it really. I was more gravitated to the courtyard space between the Chapel, and Sanctuary. But really my experience at the St. Johns UMC, facility was much like a Baptism, a HUGE rush, and before I knew what had happened it was over.

I really began to visit MCCGSL in earnest around January of 2007. Nearly 10 years after I first visited. I used to live nearby, and was a regular (sporatic) visitor from 1997-2000.

I met this person named Daniel McCree around Christmas time, and while I was in a happy 6year relationship- This was truly the SPIRIT OF GOD grabbing me, and told me very clearly... one of the exact words kinda of Spirit telling....

" You are supposed to know this person the rest of your life." but I also knew this was not intended to change the relationship I was in. And thus began the friendship, that was an embodiment of GODS LOVE, as pure as it comes.

Our freindship continued, even though the situation really fell from the sky. But we were both very Christ oriented and really felt in our heart that this was Divine. Daniel was on a spiritual quest of a driven inspiration. He was a man on a mission, and had a clear direction (which changed from minute to minute)... invariably :) He was a COMPELLER, compelling those around him into action. For the betterment of themselves and the world surrounding them.

Daniel struggled Greatly, on many battlefronts. He was in the midst of a four theatre WAR.
He stuggled with his health, nearly dying in 2003 from HIV, and coming back to living a healthy lifestlye. He kicked a nasty drug habit with meth, and truly lived in ways that most of us who call themselves "Christ- like" would envy. He was an embodiment of Christ. Giving his own foodstamp money to feed his neighbors, and picking up homeless people, and giving them a warm place in his own small apartment. He was the food and homeless shelter both! In fact Tonji (Tonya) became a fixture who stayed in his place even after his death. oops. I spilled the TEA.

The biggest struggle in Daniel's life, was LOVE. Being in love, loving, being loved, God love, Loving God, Or Could God?.... yes, Daniel struggled around the Grace of God. He had truly lived his live, in many ways. not always within his best potential. (read more at www.DanielMcCree.Org )

Daniel insisted I should become active at MCCGSL. He himself, lived in Belleville, IL, without a car, and walked three blocks to the MetroLink train station, then rode the train west for 45min. Ariving a full MILE south of church, where he would walk to St. Johns UMC. More times than not, arriving at least 10min into services. "Never a reason not to come" he would say. This same advice got me to choir practice this past week, when I was late leaving work.

Okay, Im getting to my long drawn out POINT, YES THERE IS A POINT TO ALL OF THIS--

Daniel passed away in July 2007, around the time we found out that St. Johns was closing. We held his funeral at St. Johns, and suddenly the kid that always made fun of the "older people's" attachment to churches, found myself a grown adult, still ripe with grief-- and facing in what seemed like only weeks, the certaintly of leaving the CWE location. I still miss sitting in that courtyard, as Daniel and I used to smoke a cigarette after church there, and enjoy some quiet time together.

I was so incredibly blessed by God to have known Daniel, and God truly lead me through the experience. Ironically, I always knew to say everything to Daniel, and not hold anything back. For somehow I knew time was not something we would be afforded much of. I really had no idea he would commit suicide while in Miami, although I must admit to myself, my spirit may have known more than it lead on. If you were to go back and read the emails I sent to him on the final days of his life, one would not have to stretch the imagination that I felt the storm was coming. Daniel had some spiritual abilities, I will never understand. It was much as if he had a direct line to God. We somehow always had the ability to understand each other, without talking much. We just did. and we spent a lot of time, exchanging emails. In fact we may not see each other but maybe twice a week, as he was a full-time art student at SWIC.

So My point is, I simply want to give some Credit to my beloved Daniel McCree, for it is in his spirit, that the website of The Hope and Help Center came to be. When I was creating Daniel's website, it was as if he was sitting on my shoulder telling what to put where, and specifically what songs to put on his playlists. (still does sometimes) When I was asked to do the website for THE HOPE AND HELP CENTER, I heard Daniels voice tell me DO IT!... so I began a time of prayer and relfection, for guidance. What to a visitor of the website seems like a daunting task, was truly a labor of Love, and much like Daniel's website, I felt the spirit really lead me through the initial stages of its development. Still today, the sprit leads- other members contribute greatly to the Center.

"God Buries His Workmen... but carries on his Work" ( stain glass window that was located in St. Johns UMC 63108) donated by the "Ladies Aid" group. *time unknown

Second Sunday of Advent - LOVE

Sunday, December 7, 2008
Weekly Devotional - Second Sunday of Advent - LOVE

www.HopeandHelpCenter.org

Weekly Devotional - Second Sunday of Advent - LOVE

by Rev. Sue Yarber

1 Corinthians 13

If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.

It doesn't seem to matter how many times I have heard these words, each time I get a key phrase that rings in my head as a resounding bell, bidding me to take a closer look inside. I can quickly list the ways in which I fall short of the kind of love described in the epistle to the church at Corinth. It is far more challenging to see the ways that I bear this kind of love in the world. Even to consider that I am a Christ-bearer, one who strives to exemplify Christ's love in this broken and battered world, is a lot to take in.

Beyond the worldly notions of love: romantic, giddy, passionate love, and nurturing, gentle, protective love, there is a love that lasts forever, a truth that never dies. God's unconditional love for us lays a road for us to follow into the light of day that will not darken. Love is, in the end the only thing that matters. It is the one thing upon which every life is, ultimately, measured. I have never preached a funeral in which the person's profession was the main topic or the kind of car they drove was of any consequence whatsoever. All I have ever talked about is how the person demonstrated love for God and the world around them. Love is the only thing that lasts forever.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You can now receive the weekly meditation in your email inbox. Please indicate on your attendance card or email danny@mccgsl.org to be added to the list.
Posted by "D's Cheeze" at Sunday, December 07, 2008
Labels: Building Together, Community News, Devotional, LGBT(I) News, mccgsl

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Yesterday, December 07, 2008, 11:14:44 PM

Weekly Devotional - Second Sunday of Advent - LOVE
Yesterday, December 07, 2008, 6:01:49 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")
http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/Weekly Devotional - Second Sunday of Advent - LOVEby Rev. Sue Yarber1 Corinthians 13 If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.It doesn't seem to matter how many times I have heard these words, each time I get a key phrase that rings in my head as a resounding bell, bidding me to take a closer look inside. I can quickly list the ways in which I fall short of the kind of love described in the epistle to the church at Corinth. It is far more challenging to see the ways that I bear this kind of love in the world. Even to consider that I am a Christ-bearer, one who strives to exemplify Christ's love in this broken and battered world, is a lot to take in.Beyond the worldly notions of love: romantic, giddy, passionate love, and nurturing, gentle, protective love, there is a love that lasts forever, a truth that never dies. God's unconditional love for us lays a road for us to follow into the light of day that will not darken. Love is, in the end the only thing that matters. It is the one thing upon which every life is, ultimately, measured. I have never preached a funeral in which the person's profession was the main topic or the kind of car they drove was of any consequence whatsoever. All I have ever talked about is how the person demonstrated love for God and the world around them. Love is the only thing that lasts forever.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------You can now receive the weekly meditation in your email inbox. Please indicate on your attendance card or email danny@mccgsl.org to be added to the list.


World AIDS Day Dec 1st
Sunday, November 30, 2008, 10:56:14 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")

VISIT THE EZEKIEL PROJECT ONLINE
http://hopeandhelpcenter.org/ezekiel.aspx
http://www.christchurchcathedral.us/
On the evening of Monday, Dec. 1, be part of the worldwide movement leading the response to AIDS. Come with your family, your friends and your memories to the World AIDS Day Memorial Service at Christ Church Cathedral, 1210 Locust St., St. Louis, MO 63103.
An hour before the 7 p.m. service, there will be a reading of names of those who have died, those who continue to live with HIV/AIDS and those who give care.
At the service, The Rev. Michael Kinman will preach and The Rev. Renee Fenner will celebrate. The service includes the Sacrament of Healing and the participation of the Gateway Men’s Chorus. Panels from the Names Project also will be on display.To submit names to be read beginning at 6 p.m. (first name only or first and last names; year of death, if applicable, also may be included),
email cccathedral.oasis@yahoo.com or call Todd Eller at (314) 452-2025.
Please specify if the person has died, is living with HIV/AIDS or is a caretaker.


TFL Album Release! ...Whosoever
Sunday, November 30, 2008, 3:29:38 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")
http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/http://www.tflmusic.com/We are proud to announce the long anticpated release of TFL's second Album " Whosoever"Now Available!TFL (Turner, Fraley & Long) is an exciting Christain music group based in St. Louis, MO. Our message in music is clear: it is a message of hope, of peace, and of love for every believer. Through this site we hope you'll learn more about us, listen to our music clips and see when we'll be in concert in your area.
BUY IT NOW! http://www.tflmusic.com/id5.html
Listen to clips from the first Album: www.myspace.com/faithstreet


New Video Sermons now available!
Saturday, November 29, 2008, 6:32:12 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")
http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/MCCGSL has released 2 new video sermons, from both Transgender Day of Remembrance, and Harvest Sundays in November. Thank you to Katie Hotze, and all those that contribute to the development of these video sermons.http://vimeo.com/mccgsl


World AIDS Day 2008- Rev Elder Wilson
Monday, November 24, 2008, 12:53:27 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")
http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/
Sermon for World AIDS Day 2008 - Uncommon Hope: First Sunday in AdventWritten by admin on November 24th, 2008by Rev. Elder Nancy WilsonModerator, Metropolitan Community ChurchesReadingMark 13: 24-37“But in those days, after that time of distress, the sun will be darkened, the moon will lose its brightness, the stars will fall from the sky and the powers in heaven will be shaken. Then they will see the Promised One coming in the clouds with great power and glory; then the angels will be sent to gather the people of God from the four winds, from the ends of the earth to the ends of heaven.“Take the fig tree as parable: as soon as its twigs grow supple and its leaves come out, you know that summer is near. In the same way, when you see these things happening, know that the Promised one is near, right at the door. The truth is, before this generation has passed away, all these things will have taken place. Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will not pass away.“But as for that day or hour, nobody knows it – neither the angels of Heaven, nor the Only Begotten – no one but Abba God. Be constantly on the watch! Stay awake! You do not know when the appointed time will come.“It is like people travelling abroad. They leave their home and put the employees in charge, each with a certain task, and those who watch at the front gate are ordered to stay on the alert. So stay alert! You do not know when cock crows or at early dawn. Do not let the owner come suddenly and catch you asleep. What I say to you, I say to all: stay alert!MessageThe 2008 hurricane season in Florida and the Gulf Coast was challenging and intense.In some ways, a hurricane is not unlike a virus – it is opportunistic, arbitrary. How much damage it does depends on a lot of other factors: How strong are the levees; How prepared is the community (can they evacuate safely, on time); How strong is the construction; How many resources have been employed in preparation and prevention of storm damage; How much degradation of the environment has occurred, etc… Poverty exacerbates the damage; and co-factors really matter in hurricanes as well as with viruses.For better or worse, in the worship and liturgical life of Metropolitan Community Churches (MCC), World AIDS Day is married to the first Sunday in Advent, now, perpetually. Advent begins in darkness every year. In the Northern Hemisphere, the post-hurricane days themselves grow darker until just before Christmas, while our Advent wreath grows brighter with hope, peace, joy and love.But we begin, in the darkness, with hope. The Christian calendar begins, in the lectionary readings, ominously, but also with hints of hope, of a brighter future where Christ returns and rescues a world gone mad.The writer of that first gospel, called Mark, in the midst of the first persecutions and sufferings, calls that first community of radical Christians to an uncommon hope: to be alert, awake, and watchful as God prepares to act. In some ways, watching, keeping alert and vigilant can seem too passive for some. But it implies a lot of things that are more active as well.This year, many of us in North America watched and waited with residents of New Orleans and the Gulf Coast as they anticipated storm after storm, with deadly Katrina still fresh on their minds. We prepared, waited, acted and responded. . .Preparing: In some ways, by now, people know the drill for hurricanes. They know to board up, or buy water and supplies, or begin sorting through what they can take in their car, or on a bus. This year, thoroughly chastened by Katrina, the US government and non-profit agencies seemed more prepared.We, too, know the drill about HIV and AIDS. We know so much more now than we did 27 years ago about prevention. We know the co-factors – apathy, lack of self-esteem, homophobia, drug abuse, poverty, lack of access to health care, unsafe drinking water, lack of information and education, especially for women. We also are storm-weary, still, and get overwhelmed by new statistics about alarming rates of infection among young people, especially those who are homeless, women, people of color, young gay men. Our weariness has affected our vigilance at times. We see the storm clouds coming, but pray it will just pass us by. Sometimes we collude in the denial that envelopes our communities, our churches. We interpret the silence to mean that there is no storm on the way.People in Louisiana worry that if they are overly prepared for a storm that does not come this time, they will be less likely to heed warnings the next time; such is human nature. We have to constantly move against the complacency, the inertia, the passivity.I guess Jesus knew this. He shared our nature, and knew how easy it is for us to revert to denial. He warns us to keep alert, to be prepared, spiritually, in every way. HIV and AIDS prevention is still a moral imperative for us. We must challenge every nation about its policies, as a matter of justice. We must challenge ourselves to vigilance around the message: we value your life, and the life of our community – prevention is possible! And for those already infected, life and longer life is possible! We are people of uncommon hope, sometimes even irrational hope.Watching/Waiting: Mark’s Gospel insists that we stay vigilant and alert: that we stay tuned to the weather channel and CNN, as grueling as that can be; that we hear the calls for evacuation and heed them. I can hear Mayor Ray Nagin saying, “GET YOUR BUTTS OUT OF NEW ORLEANS!”After weeks of storm warnings and flipping constantly to the weather channel, I got complacent. I was shocked when we had sudden, violent thunderstorms on my way from work one way, the outer bands of hurricane “Ike,” just barely touching us. I just knew it wasn’t coming our way – I was surprised by how far out it reached. The flooding on my way to the office the next morning was alarming, and the rains so heavy I nearly pulled over.MCC, we must keep alert, keep awake, about HIV and AIDS. Another generation of young gay men is endangered, just as we have become so deeply aware of the generations we lost to AIDS years ago. The impact of that loss is still being felt in so many ways. New challenges and losses are upon us, and sometimes we are asleep, we are not paying attention to the wider community that our church may not touch, who do not touch us, not yet.We must keep alert to new trends and new information. To understand the new co-factors that fuel infection rates in the US, in the North and West, and in the East and Global South. As a global community, MCC, how do we understand the connections between AIDS and Human Rights; between AIDS and emerging LGBT communities in places like Uganda and Pakistan and the Ukraine? Who are our allies and partners? How are we aware of the changing nature of the pandemic and what our spiritual/pastoral/justice responses must be?Every MCC church must have that expertise, the AIDS alert button, embedded in its ministry. Truthfully, for some of our churches, that expertise died or retired and we did not replace it. Today, who in your church does a person “come out” to about being newly diagnosed? Who can they talk to about their struggles with medication and compliance? Who is responding to “coming out” issues and HIV prevention?Some of us have to re-connect our congregations to what is really happening today in our communities, something the MCC Global HIV/AIDS Ministry has been doing with excellence the last few years. It is time to turn on the weather channel, learn to read the Doppler ratings. . .Acting: In hurricanes, this often means evacuating, getting far enough away to stay safe. It means having safe places to evacuate to. With HIV and AIDS, it means facing up to what it takes to keep people safe and alive and filled with hope.The people of Haiti had nowhere to flee, no shelters, no buses. The “levees” are broken. They have no protection, no barriers. The deforestation there means that mud slides unimpeded down the mountain. Poverty, racism, years of colonial rule followed by government corruption has made the people more vulnerable to hurricanes, and HIV. Even the UN struggled to get in emergency food and shelters while the storm was raging.Those people who are most vulnerable to HIV infection and the impact of AIDS live in these kinds of conditions. For many of us, that is hard to take in.This year, in New Orleans and the surrounding areas, unlike during Katrina, there was a lot of attention to evacuation. The elderly and those who were disabled or vulnerable in some way were evacuated first. The last time, they were largely forgotten – those in nursing homes, or with mobility issues. The biggest problem this year was people who did not go to shelters, but evacuated themselves, and then could not afford it, and were clamoring to come back early because they were sleeping in their cars and had no food. Every time we do this, we learn more about the potential impact.I saw one touching account of how people who could not evacuate acted. There was a children’s hospital that served children who were very ill, too much so to transport. Evacuation would have been very dangerous. They made sure they moved to the upper floors, had generators to last 3 or 4 weeks, and the entire staff, doctors, nurses, technicians, janitors, and parents, moved in to the hospital together, with the children, and hunkered down.This is solidarity, it is the solidarity of Mother of Peace orphanage in Zimbabwe, the solidarity of MCC with those whose battle with AIDS in those final stages, where we hunker down and hold a vigil and keep faith with those, who, even today in 2008, are dying.Returning and Restoring: Once the initial emergency subsides, there is the long, slow work of clean-up and repairing, restoring.This is not the romantic phase of the work in hurricanes. This is the tedious work: removing flood water and debris; assessing damage; tossing out all that was ruined; tearing up and re-building walls and floors; getting the power back on; emptying the refrigerator; scrubbing and painting.In AIDS work and ministry, it is the nitty-gritty of paying attention to public policies; attending to co-factors: drug use; poverty; access to medications and treatment; talking about things that make people uncomfortable; examining our own attitudes, prejudices; being willing to get better information and sharing it; and working with long term survivors.Today I remember Paul from MCC Los Angeles, who died last year in a freak accident at the beach. Paul was a long time HIV and AIDS survivor when I met him, but he was barely surviving. He was depressed, without friends or community, empty, aching, given to violent outbursts, and feeling like a ghost who had outlived every friend. MCC Los Angeles gave him a new life. Starting one day a week, he eventually came to volunteer fulltime: answering the phone, painting, playing piano and singing, helping with the young adults group. He got on better meds, found a better place to live. He made friends, found a home and purpose, God and Jesus and love. He rode in the AIDS Ride two years in a row. He made a difference. He died in the midst of a full, second life. He was a happy, restored man. There are so many, like Paul, who need us and we need them.
We must learn about the world of HIV and AIDS in 2008, not remain stuck in 1988. A world that includes young activists in Uganda being arrested for protesting that their government will not fund any prevention for HIV/AIDS in sexual minority communities. In Uganda, silence still equals death, and speaking up means imprisonment. This is true in many places in the world.
It means reaching out to young queer people in North America who may not think they belong in MCC, or in any church. We have to let them know that none of us belonged at first. And we have to let them know that we care about what they care about, and about their spirituality, their need for community, even if it seems different from ours. Even if it is queer, unusual, uncommon. Jesus would welcome them, and get to know them, and be able to touch them with hope and love. This we know.Wake up, MCC. It is 2008, and HIV and AIDS are still raging, like a hurricane that seems to dissipate, but then gathers strength over a warm Gulf. There may be a day that we do not need a World AIDS Day…a day when our uncommon hope will not be needed in the work of HIV and AIDS. That day is not December 1, 2008. We need it, and those living with HIV and AIDS, or at risk, need us. Today.
© 2008 Metropolitan Community Churches Global HIV/AIDS MinistryAll rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the written permission of Metropolitan Community Churches. For permission to reprint contact Joshua L. Love, Director of Metropolitan Community Churches Global HIV/AIDS Ministry at http://www.mccchurch.org/ .


TDOR Nov 16th (Transgender Day of Remembrance)
Saturday, November 15, 2008, 4:44:08 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")

MCCGSL will observe Transgender Day of Remembrance during our 11:30AM Sunday worship, on November 16th, 2008. If you are in St. Louis, we invite you to join us!
http://hopeandhelpcenter.org/transgenderunity.aspx
Location: 112 Sidney Street (In Soulard) 63104
need support? transgender@mccgsl.org


New Video Sermons!
Tuesday, November 04, 2008, 1:59:19 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")
http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/"Sharing the Gospel" - Rev. Dr. Carol Trissell10-28-08 11:30 worship"Sharing the Gospel" from MCC of Greater St. Louis on Vimeo.


Weekly Devotional 10-26-08
Sunday, October 26, 2008, 11:05:54 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")
http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/Building Together: Interior DecoratingOctober 26, 2008Rev. Sue YarberA house is made a home when loving people gather and they bring expressions of God's love to life. Color, design, furnishings, and artwork all tell us about the person or people who own/s the house; these elements bring warmth, creativity and character to the home. When I think about my home, I want it to be welcoming and comfortable for guests. I want it to reflect who I am, my values, my tastes, and my character. My home is a place for me to extend hospitality to others. My fondest memories are long meals with friends gathered around one of our dining rooms tables; evenings that included laughter, games, fellowship and fabulous food. Hospitality feeds us spiritually as well as physically. It draws us in, invites us into relationship with one another and moves us to a new level of safety with each other.We have laid a solid foundation with Christ as our cornerstone. We have built walls that separate us from the world so that we can experience renewal. We have put up a roof to protect us from the outside elements and given our highest praise to God. Now we can turn our attention to interior decorating. We can select the furnishings that will allow us to convey our unique character and our best self to the world. In my home it is the small details of color and shape that pull the individual rooms together. Each room in our place to call home will have its own distinct character and yet, there will be congruent themes running throughout the whole place.The gospel of John states that "In my Heavenly Parent's house there are many rooms..." and so it will be with our new church facility. Not everyone will be drawn to the same room, we all have many gifts and they are different from one another. The spirit has gifted each one of us differently and so some will want to design the kitchen, and they will gather there to offer the hospitality of food. Others will have visions about the children's ministry or the choir room. I trust that God will bless us with lots of ideas and lots of creative energy. With God's love and guidance as our highest good, we cannot make a mistake in determining the form or function of the spaces we will call home.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------You can now receive the weekly meditation in your email inbox. Please indicate on your attendance card or email danny@mccgsl.org to be added to the list.


Creating a Life That Matters NOV 3RD
Sunday, October 26, 2008, 11:04:30 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")

http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/
Next Class is November 3rd at 1919 South Broadway
to RSVP contact: danny@mccgsl.org
VISIT THE CLM WEBSITE
Creating a Life that Matters is all about relationships: intentional, authentic relationships - with the Sacred, our Self, and our Passion. CLM transforms lives and inspires people to more directed, clear, passionate involvement in their life and in the life of the planet, through the support of their local MCC.Download the CLM Informational Brochure!



Weekly Devotional 10-26-08
Sunday, October 26, 2008, 11:03:06 PM noreply@blogger.com ("D's Cheeze")
http://www.hopeandhelpcenter.org/Building Together: Interior DecoratingOctober 26, 2008Rev. Sue YarberA house is made a home when loving people gather and they bring expressions of God's love to life. Color, design, furnishings, and artwork all tell us about the person or people who own/s the house; these elements bring warmth, creativity and character to the home. When I think about my home, I want it to be welcoming and comfortable for guests. I want it to reflect who I am, my values, my tastes, and my character. My home is a place for me to extend hospitality to others. My fondest memories are long meals with friends gathered around one of our dining rooms tables; evenings that included laughter, games, fellowship and fabulous food. Hospitality feeds us spiritually as well as physically. It draws us in, invites us into relationship with one another and moves us to a new level of safety with each other.We have laid a solid foundation with Christ as our cornerstone. We have built walls that separate us from the world so that we can experience renewal. We have put up a roof to protect us from the outside elements and given our highest praise to God. Now we can turn our attention to interior decorating. We can select the furnishings that will allow us to convey our unique character and our best self to the world. In my home it is the small details of color and shape that pull the individual rooms together. Each room in our place to call home will have its own distinct character and yet, there will be congruent themes running throughout the whole place.The gospel of John states that "In my Heavenly Parent's house there are many rooms..." and so it will be with our new church facility. Not everyone will be drawn to the same room, we all have many gifts and they are different from one another. The spirit has gifted each one of us differently and so some will want to design the kitchen, and they will gather there to offer the hospitality of food. Others will have visions about the children's ministry or the choir room. I trust that God will bless us with lots of ideas and lots of creative energy. With God's love and guidance as our highest good, we cannot make a mistake in determining the form or function of the spaces we will call home.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------You can now receive the weekly meditation in your email inbox. Please indicate on your attendance card or email danny@mccgsl.org to be added to the list.

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CREATED IN GOD
Kelly McFarland - MCC Portland, Portland, OR, USA

THIS SERMON WAS PREACHED TO AN MCC CONGREGATION ON APRIL 7, 2002

SUBJECT: CREATED IN GOD’S IMAGE: THE INTEGRATION OF OUR SEXUALITY AND OUR SPIRTUALITY

TITLE: CROSSING OVER

Readings: Exodus chapter 3 verses 1-10
Romans chapter 12 verses 1-2

Introduction:

At the outset this morning I want to say to you that this is a vast subject. To discuss this matter fully would require much more attention and time than we have available in this venue.
In fact, there is a leadership conference, a cruise planned by our denomination this fall, in which half of the group will be discussing this particular topic for the entire four-day event. So we are just going to touch on a few things this morning. Don’t worry. I’m not going to preach for four days.

Because of who we are individually, and because of who we are corporately, we need to have this theology nailed down. However, because time is short, my intention is to share with you some thoughts this morning, that are not being presented as the once and for all, final word on this subject, but rather as a hypothesis that is still under construction. Perhaps one of these thoughts will become a seed that germinates and bears fruit in your own life and spirit.

One of the most commonly used metaphors, understood universally, describes this life as a journey.
It is a precise symbol of this life that we are living.

A journey has drama, and we all know a few drama people
don’t we? Yes, indeed a journey certainly has drama.
A journey begins somewhere and ends somewhere.
There is movement. There is momentum. There is
progression to a journey. You can mark your progress
by milestones. This life of faith is rightly called a journey
of faith.

One of the best allegories used to understand the
dynamics of our journey, is the story of the exodus of the
Hebrew children.

It is a story of liberation. They were led out of bondage in Egypt.
It is a story of Devine intervention.
A way was made for them through the Red Sea.
It is a story of perseverance. They endured the wanderings in the wilderness.
It is a story of courage as they made their
way over the dangerous and muddy Jordan River.
And, it is a story of triumph, as they entered into the promised land.

This journey mirrors our experience as well.
I remember when I was in bondage, a slave to the
stinking theology of others, if you will. You may remember
when you courageously left that slavery behind, only
to find yourself wandering in the dessert, round and
round and round in circles.

You may have found yourself several times, camped on the banks of the Jordan River. Even though you had come so far, you could not find a way to cross over in to the promised land. You were unable to claim the blessings of God as your own.

And how you longed for that place of promise:
That place of plenty,
That place of joy and fulfillment,
That place of affirmation,
That place of safety and peace,
The place where you could indeed experience the abundant
life promised to us by the Christ.
You have needed, somehow, to find a bridge.
A bridge that would enable you to finally cross over
that dangerous river and get to the other side.

Many times I started to cross, but I found myself
Overwhelmed.
The current of that river was too swift.
The water was too cold.
I was thrown against the rocks.
Many times I almost went under.
Somehow, with God’s grace, I made it back to the shore.
Where I began to realize that I would never be able to go through that river,
I needed a way to cross over.

I hear you asking me today:
Just how do we build this bridge?
How can I enter that place of promise?
How can we cross over the dangerous Jordan River?
How can I begin to live out the blessings that are mine as
a precious and loved child of God?
Well here is my hypothesis.

I. THE HYPOTHESIS

Each end of the bridge that we need to build
is held up by us owning up to two aspects of our identity.

II. THE TWO ENDS OF THE BRIDGE

First of all, one end of the bridge is held up by
us owning up to our spiritual identity.

We are spiritual beings. Scripture declares in
Genesis, that you and I are created in the image of God.
Because our minds are limited by our humanness,
we cannot really understand all that this means.
However we do know that we have a spiritual
capacity. By experience we know the call and the voice
of Spirit in our own heart and our own Soul.

When God created us it is said that we were formed
from the dust of the earth. God breathed into us the
breath of life and we became living souls. Beings
with the capacity to know God in this earthly realm.
Owning up to this part of our identity is vital to our
crossing over life’s dangerous Jordan River, and
moving on into the promised land.

Now, the other end of the bridge is held up by our owning up to a second part of our identity;
our sexual identity.

Not only are we spiritual beings, we are also
sexual beings.
God gave us the capacity for sexual expression.
God is not against sex. God likes it.
God invented this intimate language of affirmation.

Do you know why?
Well, I was trying to figure this part out,
and I read a wonderful book recently entitled “Embodiment”. It was actually written in the late Seventies.
It is an excellent book. James B. Nelson, the author, calls it “an approach to sexuality and Christian Theology”.
In this book Mr. Nelson states that, “human sexuality is not only part of God’s creation, it is also one of the clues; indeed it is the central clue to what God is up to in this world”.

Mr. Nelson insists over and over again, that
“our sexuality is the basis for our capacity to enter in to relationships; relationships which are life enhancing, life enriching, and relationships which provide the possibility for humans to become what God would have them become,
namely, fulfilled, integrated, sharing, and free recipients
of Devine love.”

So you are sitting here this morning, on the corner of
Twenty-fourth and Broadway, in Portland, Oregon,
the month of April, daylight saving Sunday, and you
say: what in the world does all of this mean for those of us in the Gay-Lesbian-Bisexual-Trans-gendered community,
and I would add the heterosexual community as well?

III. THE PATTERN

Well, there is a pattern here. I have seen this pattern repeated in my own life. I have also seen it repeated in the life experience of many others.

Even clinical psychologists have made this observation.
Carl Jung once wrote, after observing many hundreds of
patients, that “when people brought sexual questions to him, they invariably turned out to be religious questions,
and when they brought religious questions to him, they
always turned out to be sexual ones”.

This pattern of behavior; this way of reacting to
certain things, has destroyed many of us. This pattern
has kept us wandering in the wilderness. For years,
yes, even for decades, some of us have been hindered
from crossing over into the promised land, and this pattern
is a momentum that is still destroying lives today.

When we are told that we are an abomination,
When our parents have cast us out,
When our families have disowned us,
When society, reflecting the attitude of the church,
Has made it OK to discriminate against us,
When we are constantly disaffirmed by our spiritual mentors,
When we are made to believe that even God, our creator,
hates us, what is our common reaction?

Well, I think, our survival instincts kick in. We totally
turn away from anything spiritual. We say, “OK, if spirituality is an impossibility, I’m not going to pursue
that at all”. We find ourselves trying to build a bridge
based only on our sexuality.

This kind of a bridge will not work.
It is out of balance.
When you attempt to cross over in to the promised land
on this bridge, you end up in the dangerous Jordan River.
You find yourself drowning in the swiftly flowing water.
The coldness paralyzes you.
Your very life is beaten out of you as you are dashed against the rocks.
The rocks in this river have names that we recognize.
Things like drug addiction.
Things like alcoholism, sexual addictions, obsessions
of all kinds, which the scripture calls idolatry.
There are many others too numerous to mention.

We find that some of us are lost to the river.

Then there is another group. Maybe this has been your
journey. These individuals focus only on the spirituality
end of the bridge. They totally ignore their sexuality.
They deny this entire part of their God given identity.

They think they are seeking God with their whole heart,
when in reality they sweep half of themselves under
the carpet. Thinking that their sexuality makes them an
abomination, and believing themselves to be evil,
they try to substitute more spirituality for sexuality.
This model is also flawed. It doesn’t work.
It can’t work.

I must confess to you this morning, that I feel this was
probably my experience. I have always loved the
church and God’s people. I used to say that I could
not remember when I became a Christian.
I was raised in a Christian home.
These things have always been with me.
I started my own personal ministry in the fifth grade
when I became the church pianist. I had my own
traveling gospel group when I was in high school.
We recorded an album when I was 17.
I went on to a Christian college, where I was the student
body president and valedictorian. After college I was
ordained and found myself in full time ministry.
Oh yes, the spiritual side of my bridge was progressing
nicely. But I had not even began to deal with my sexuality.
I thought if I ignored it, it would just go away.

Remember I said that these are patterns I have observed?
In this model, I believe that we often see people coming
to a fork in the road. At this moment some people marry;
thinking all they need is a spouse, a couple of kids, and
a house payment. Others may enter seminary, or enter a
convent or a monastery. These may all be seen as attempts to build a bridge, enabling them to cross over.

I sold everything I had and went on a missionary trip to
Calcutta, India. I have a wonderful picture of myself
arm in arm with Mother Teresa. I headed up a team that
fed 30,000 Bangladesh refugees at the city dump every
single day. Our kitchens were never shutdown. The stoves
and ovens went round the clock, twenty-four hours a day.

But, my friend, I know from experience, that even the most dramatic attempts to build a bridge which ignores one entire half of your identity will not be adequate enough to allow you to cross over. And, I found myself plunging into the dangerous river, dashed like so many others, against those same rocks of addictions, obsessions, idolatry and despair.

IV. THE STORY OF MOSES

Our reading, a moment ago, was the story of Moses.
The movie: “The 10 Commandments”, was on again recently. I ask you to recall a few things with me.

Moses mother hid him in a basket down at the river
to save his life. Pharo’s daughter, miraculously found the young child and took him to the palace. Moses was adopted and raised as a member of the royal family. He was Hebrew, but was raised as an Egyptian prince.

Later on, it seems he was confused about his identity. Because of his reactions to the ambiguous expectations of his conflicting loyalties, Moses found himself exiled to the backside of the desert. There, he spent forty years tending sheep. Then, one day, Moses noticed something off in the distance, something astonishing and it caught his eye.

It was a bush that was burning, but the bush was not consumed. The story goes on to say that Moses turned aside to see this great sight. As he made his way to the bush there was this voice. It was the voice of the almighty speaking, and the words were directed to him.

God said, “Moses, take off
your shoes, for you are standing on holy ground”.
In that moment with God, Moses answered the call.
In that moment Moses found out what he was supposed to do with the rest if his life. In that moment it became clear to Moses what the journey had been about all along. He was to be a liberator. Moses understood that hundreds of years of slavery and bondage made no difference now.
Freedom was at hand for the Hebrew nation, the nation of his birth. He would lead them out of Egypt, and get them ready to enter the promised land.

Do you know what was really happening at that burning bush?

It was this: Moses finally owned up to both sides of his
identity. No one was as equipped as Moses for this particular call. He was the only Hebrew person in the land
who had any standing at all in the palace. He was in a position, because of who he was, an adopted son, to boldly walk into the Egyptian palace and demand that an entire nation be set free. Anyone else would have been apprehended, incarcerated, and executed long before they ever reached the throne room.
But Moses was able to go in time after time.
When Moses owned up fully to both sides of his identity,
he discovered God’s purpose for his life, and everything fell into place.

All the years of questions, all years of wondering why, even
the years of exile on the back side of the dessert, and all the emotions of that experience, were redeemed at the burning bush, when he owned up to both sides of his identity.

I believe that the same thing is true for you and I.
We are spiritual beings. You and I know the voice of God.
You and I have seen the hand of God at work, and I pray
that we would embrace that reality fully. You and I are also
sexual beings. We have a wonderful capacity to express
and receive affirmation, and I pray that we would embrace that reality, and all that it means fully.

Owning up to both of your identity, will open up your understanding to the dreams God has for you, and will allow you to miraculously pursue the call of God.
And, yes, you too will be able to finally cross over into the
promise land, the land of peace and fulfillment, the land of
the abundant life.

V. CONCLUSION: THE CALL OF THIS SERMON

And so, I ask you: What is the call of this sermon today?

The call of this sermon is about the will to make a journey towards wholeness. It is about a core value of this
community of faith. This sermon is about this church supporting you as you journey through the wilderness of
life. It is about our commitment to help you find a way to cross over. And it also about you turning aside from the way you have always done things in order to see a burning bush that is not consumed. The call of this sermon is about you taking off your shoes because you are on holy ground,
even in the presence of the almighty. It is about your
willingness to make a personal commitment to own up to
your sexual identity and your spiritual identity. It is about
you and I crossing over the Jordan river , and entering
the promised land, the land of the abundant life, the land
that is your inheritance as a precious and loved child of God.

May God help us to help you, in making this journey.
Would you pray with me a moment.

I thank you oh, God for each one that hears the voice of Spirit this morning. I pray that you would help us to have the courage to do the things, and change the things, that will make a difference in our lives and in this world.

I ask you to help us to pursue the call of God, whatever that might be, and I ask you to help this church in supporting each one that comes our way as they seek your presence and your will in their own life. In thy name we pray, Amen

Section One: The Experience of a Gay and Lesbian People of God

http://hopeandhelpcenter.net/spiritresearch.aspx

Original Location: http://www.dignityusa.org/book/export/html/921
Section One: The Experience of a Gay and Lesbian People of God

The Voice of the Oppressed

Invoking God's name, Church officials have forbidden us to live as God made us. They have told us to feel shame and guilt for who we are and what we do as sexual beings. They have commanded us not to speak of the truth that we know. The validity of our experience is denied — the most subtle and damaging form of oppression.

Our experience of oppression began as children when we were denied models to which we could look as we struggled to grow and mature sexually. Some of us were betrayed and abused when we sought guidance. More often, we were simply told that what made us different was disgusting and forbidden. The only hope we were offered was that we would grow out of what we felt, or that marriage would cure us, or that God would heal us if we prayed with faith, or that God's grace would enable us to endure life without sex and without intimacy.

Fear and internalized homophobia had their effect. Some of us tried to change. We used counseling, spiritual direction, heterosexual dating, and even marriage. Some of us tried to deny or repress our feelings. We acted as though we were not sexual and put up barriers to intimacy and affection. Some of us tried to live a double life. Some of us reached the point where life was unbearable. We sought relief in compulsive sex, or alcohol and drugs, or suicide.

Some of us overcame fear and came out to friends and family or a more public world. We were able to step outside the facade that was built as a defense but had become a prison. We were able to be honest with those who mattered to us. That was a liberating experience, even though it sometimes meant the loss of family, friends, employment, and Church.

Under the weight of prohibition, rejection, derision, and hate, many of us have felt estranged from God, Church, society, friends, family - even from ourselves. Our Church told us to comply or leave. Society warned us to hide our love and not flaunt our sexuality. Friends were distant. Family members were unable to understand. The need to deny feeling and affection left some among us less than whole, lacking in self-esteem, unable to trust.

Despite clear signs of progress, we still experience direct oppression within the Church. Groups that call attention to such oppression or seek the development of church teachings on sexuality are forbidden the use of church property. Some bishops oppose legislation protecting our civil rights. Even those Church officials who empathize with our struggle hardly dare to risk public gestures of fellowship and support.



The Strength of the Powerless


We are stronger, both as persons and as Christians, because we make hard moral decisions. That strength grows as we share the convictions and commitment that develop out of reflection on our experience as lesbian and gay People of God.

We have come to realize that being gay or lesbian is God's blessing and gift. All that God has created is good. All humans are created in God's own image and likeness. Since humans were not made to be alone (see Genesis 2:18), as we seek and express intimacy and love we show God's image in action. We strive to make that image clearer by together acting justly, loving tenderly, and walking humbly with our God (Micah 6:8).

In our struggle to recognize and affirm the rightness to exist as we were made, we discovered something that was distinctly ours: our ability to accept and to nurture the divine gift of selfhood. Self empowerment brings growth. We grow stronger in our commitment to live a Christian life. Our identification with Christ and with the Catholic tradition is the stronger because of the conscious decision and commitment to stay with our Church. We have the same faith, the same life of grace, and the same call to discipleship. The values we try to live by are values we have received through the Church. We are the persons and the believers that we are because we are the Church. Many of our brothers and sisters feel rejected by the Church and can no longer identify with the Church or with Christianity. We share their pain, anger, and disappointment. Still, we are convinced that God has been with us in our struggles and that it is God who strengthens us.

Not all who are leaders in the Church speak harshly. Some stand with us and proclaim the same good news that we learn from our experience. Today the Word of God speaks ever more clearly through preachers and prophets, theologians and teachers, proclaiming our dignity and rejecting the prejudice formerly sustained in the name of God. These disciples, like Jesus, suffer for speaking and living the truth. Their struggle for justice, like our own, gives birth to hope and new life.



Sexual Disciples


Even though some Church officials have tried to exclude us, we exercise our responsibility to redeem the Church from its prejudices. As our models we have the gentile woman whose insistent faith led Jesus to look beyond the Chosen People (Matthew 15:21-28) and the Roman centurion whose quiet faith was recognized in the healing of his beloved boy (Matthew 8:5-13). The Gospel of Jesus, baptism, and the Eucharist are central influences in our lives. We align ourselves with the Catholic faith community and its broader teachings on justice, respect, compassion, and human dignity.

Dignity and communities like us are Church on a grass-roots level. These gatherings are the sacramental sign that we can be lesbian and gay and Catholic. Here we listen together to God's Word and make room for one another at Christ's Table. Here we minister to one another, proclaiming the good news: God's love for Jesus lives within us.

These communities also are places where we can support one another in the continuing struggle to integral our sexuality and our spirituality. We do so by asking ourselves difficult questions and sharing honest answers.

We see our sexuality and its expression as the holy gift of God. The overwhelming majority of us are able to say that we are both sexually active and comfortable in our relationship with Christ. Being sexually active enables us to be more at ease with ourselves, more fulfilled in our relationships, more productive in our work and service. The Spirit is evident in a warmer and more peaceful prayer-life.

We acknowledge as well that sexual abstinence freely and positively chosen is good. Many of us, for various reasons, have attempted a lifestyle of sexual abstinence. Some have chosen sexual abstinence as a lifelong way of being sexual in the world, either as part of a formal religious commitment or as a way to pursue nonsexual interests more freely. Others have chosen to be sexually abstinent temporarily in order to pursue certain goals or to reassess or reestablish priorities.

However, when sexual abstinence has been imposed by an outside force life circumstances, institutional mandate, social pressures — the effect on our lives has generally been unhealthy, destructive, and alienating. The energy expended in maintaining an abstinent lifestyle left us too drained personally to enter into relationships with others or to grow spiritually. Abstinence attempted out of fear — fear of intimacy, fear of disease, fear of divine retribution — diminished our humanness, made us preoccupied with sex, left us hungering for the intimate love of another human being.

Like our heterosexual sisters and brothers, we have had to transcend centuries of teachings that not only separated spirituality and sexuality but also considered sexual expression, if not less than human, then at least a concession to human weakness. We have learned that the living Christian tradition has more to offer than prohibition and condemnation, that through the values and ideals of our faith communities we can create a positive and human sexual ethic. We want our faith to enter more directly into our sexual decisions and activity as that there well be a closer integration of sexuality and spirituality.



How We Make Our Decisions

We ask ourselves not only how our spirituality and sexuality relate but also how we make ethical decisions regarding the physical expression of our sexuality. As we reflect together on our resources and criteria for making decisions, we discover that we frequently agree on the general criteria, the values we want to live by, even though we differ on the motivation for using them and the conclusions reached in applying them.

What resources have we been using to make decisions that will be responsible and Christian? Our primary resource, because of our isolation, has been our individual experience and reflection. Health concerns influence our sexual decisions because of possible consequences to ourselves and others. Reading and prayer, traditional resources for making decisions, are next in importance. Most of us regard other traditional resources - scripture study, advice from confessor or spiritual mentor, formal religious education - as less helpful. Most of us have not found official teaching on sexuality at all helpful in making decisions.

Although we agree that a sexual ethic centered solely on procreation in the context of heterosexual marriage is not relevant to our experience as gays and lesbians, the criteria we use for sexual decisions are not so easily identified. We say that we respond to Christ's call to be loving when our primary concern is for the quality of our relationships. The values on which we base our relationships come through clearly: mutual respect, caring, compassion, trust. understanding, and generosity. What emerges from our experience and reflection is an emphasis on persons and on actions that further personal and spiritual growth. We hear a call to an intimacy in relationships that links sexuality and spirituality. It is a call that Christians identify with Jesus, who challenged the disciples to love God totally and to love all others as themselves (Matthew 22:34-40). It is a call that Christians recognize as the ongoing presence of the Spirit.

Generally, we seek relationships that are whole and not just the expression of genital sexuality. Most of us almost instinctively reject sexual activity that is selfish or manipulative, that harms or exploits. Some prefer to reserve sexual lovemaking for one person in the context of a lifelong commitment, and many regard lifelong fidelity in a monogamous relationship as the ideal to strive for. Other couples have remained faithful to one another while allowing for some sexual expression outside their relationship, and some attempt completely open relationships. Others of us are sexually active as singles, either because we choose to be single, or because we have not yet found a companion. Some of us abstain from sexual activity for a variety of reasons.

What motivates our use of these criteria? Some base their decisions on values that they believe contribute to a good human life. Some base their decisions on what they see as God's will for them. Some base their decisions on how they identify as disciples of Jesus. Whatever the motivation and rationale, the actual criteria differ very little.

Most of us have said that we developed decision-making criteria ourselves, but, when we discuss them together, we find that our faith in Jesus Christ and our identification with the Christian community strongly influence our lifestyles as lesbians and gays. We recognize wrongdoing and sin in our sexual activity when we realize that we have violated our personal convictions or that our relationship with God has been harmed. Social convention and Church regulations have little impact. Our understanding of sexual ethics thus seems to be centered more on character and personal values than on rules.

Diversity of sexual and genital behavior is more visible and more openly discussed in the gay and lesbian community than it is among heterosexuals. We differ among ourselves in evaluating some of these practices. As we discuss them together, we are challenged to recognize the quality of each relationship and to find within it the presence of God. In doing so, we find that we can come to a greater understanding of sexual rituals that are not part of our own lovemaking. We see this as a valuable way of continuing to learn from one another and to care for one another.

As Catholic lesbians and gays we have struggled to affirm our place in the divine plan for salvation. We have emerged from our struggle strong in our faith, respectful of the human person, tolerant of diversity, supportive of the struggles of others, and strongly committed to seeking justice for ourselves and all our sisters and brothers.

Our struggles are not yet finished. We must continue to speak frankly of our experience as gay and lesbian Catholics in order to live and grow in Christ while helping others. We have often been too much in awe of the Church as institution to speak. We have listened to Church officials - sometimes abiding by their restrictions, sometimes rejecting them. Sometimes, like children seeking a parent's approval, we have asked our leaders to change their positions and accept us. Too rarely have we gone further.

Fear makes us hesitate: fear of publicity, fear that greater visibility will cost us what we have gained, fear of further reprisals form Church authorities, fear that what we say will divide us. But greater fears have been overcome, and we are the better for it. To remain faithful, we must go further.